Joe Biden’s Energetic State Of The Union Has Republicans Pedaling Cocaine Conspiracies

After months of theories claiming that President Joe Biden had dementia, Republicans pivoted to a new attack after an energetic State of the Union address last night. Several Republican influencers, as highlighted by Media Matters For America‘s Matthew Gertz, began suggesting that Biden was hopped up on more than just patriotism. “I think I just got to the bottom of the untraceable little baggie found at the White House,” wrote Fox host Julie Banderas.

Biden, who finds himself between right-wing critics attacking him on border control and left-wing critics attacking him on Gaza, came out swinging in his annual address to Congress. Amongst the topics addressed were a warning to Vladimir Putin, a promise to restore Roe v. Wade, and the announcement of a temporary seaport to circumvent the Israeli blockade of Gaza. However, the official Republican response, delivered by Alabama Senator Katie Britt, took aim at Biden’s immigration record and tried to champion the GOP as the “defenders of women”.

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Donald Trump Issues Unhinged Response To State Of The Union

Meanwhile, Donald Trump had his own response to Joe Biden. ”That may be the Angriest, Least Compassionate, and Worst State of the Union Speech ever made. It was an Embarrassment to our Country! He wants our Country to be flooded with Migrants,” Trump ranted. Alongside his progressive slate of policies, Biden had also taken shots at Trump over the January 6 insurrection. Biden said his likely November opponent had “failed in his duty of care” as President.

Furthermore, Trump took aim at Mark Zuckerberg. ”If you get rid of TikTok, Facebook and Zuckerschmuck will double their business. I don’t want Facebook, who cheated in the last Election, doing better. They are a true Enemy of the People!” Trump claimed. The former President, who is currently the presumptive Republican nominee for November’s election, certainly made a choice by invoking electoral fraud. Trump is currently facing multiple legal cases surrounding his attempts to interfere with the 2020 election.

Read More: Plies Calls Out Donald Trump And His Supporters Celebrating Iowa Caucus Win

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Conservatives Are Predictably Losing It Over The Super Bowl Halftime Show (And Calling It ‘Sexual Anarchy’)

Oh boy. Where to start? The lead up to the Super Bowl included reports that Eminem was told not to kneel during the Halftime show. Well, Marshall Mathers did, in fact, kneel as a gesture of solidarity toward Colin Kaepernick. Surely, you’ve seen the moment by now, but just in case you haven’t, it goes down here (shortly after the 11:00 mark), and this was obviously too much for conservatives to handle. The same goes for the entirety of the Halftime show that included Dr. Dre, Kendrick Lamar, Mary J. Bilge, Snoop, and an upside down 50 Cent.

None of this would stand for conservatives, including activist Charlie Kirk, whose tweet genuinely looked like parody (but it wasn’t). “The NFL is now the league of sexual anarchy,” Kirk wrote. “This halftime show should not be allowed on television.”

AOC (who once called conservatives “creepy weirdos” for their apparent fixation on her looks) had a swift response: “Like I said, weirdos.”

And from there, “sexual anarchy” inspired a ton of comebacks.

Yep, the far-right also seemed steamed about Eminem’s presence in general.

And as lawyer Ron Filipkowski joked, “MAGA is upset that the NFL didn’t bring out more ‘wholesome’ entertainment like Kid Rock and Ted Nugent.”

Is it a joke, though, if MAGA people really want this to happen?

And from there, the Kid Rock-related comebacks poured in because, as one person pointed out, “The distance between Eminem and Kid Rock as white rappers from Michigan could not be greater.”

A whole lot of pearls will meet their maker over this one. Is it time for the next Super Bowl yet? Asking, uh, for a friend who enjoys chaos.